Last year I created the Inner Art Creations: West Africa Project with director (and my boyfriend) Ballard C. Boyd. Ballard and I intended to travel to two schools, one in Ghana and one in Liberia, and offer our respective services - he would do film work for them and I would teach Brain Gym and Movement Based Learning to the staff and students.
I first envisioned the project at the end of 2013 and by May 2014 we had successfully raised 125% of the funds needed to make it a reality via our Indiegogo Campaign!
Long story short, we were all set to go when the Ebola Outbreak hit Liberia and, as a result, the entire project was put on hold.
Now, 8 months later, we have rebooked our international flights and will be traveling end of May to mid June, 2015! Read the latest update here.
The 8 months between then and now have been an ongoing practice in letting go and trusting.
At first, when we found out about the outbreak, I was disappointed, but also incredibly grateful for our safety.
Once the initial shock passed, I immediately wanted to force a solution. My mind raced for months about when we could reschedule and how we could make it work. Even though we received an overwhelming amount of support, I felt guilty that people had funded the project and feared that it wouldn't continue as planned.
I desperately wanted to feel in control, to be able to fix it. Yet there was so much about the situation that was just not up to me.
Let go. Trust.
That was the message I kept receiving, but it was much easier said than done.
Could I let go when I had raised thousands of dollars of other peoples' money? Could I trust when there were limitations on rescheduling our international flights?
The more I attempted to take it into my own hands, the less joyful it became.
Over time and with help, I began to release my grip.
The answers have been showing up, the pieces falling into place, and although it may still not go as I planned, I surrender knowing that the highest possible outcome will come to pass and I am grateful no matter what that outcome will be.
Practice of Surrender
What helped me most was the following practice of surrender:
- Sit quietly.
- Breathe deeply into your belly.
- Raise your palms to the sky.
- Relax into these words - and continue to melt into them:
- Angels, Universe, God: Thank you for the highest possible outcome for all involved.
- I surrender to divine timing.
- I surrender.